Lemonade Stand Ran By Underaged Juveniles Busted Up Due To No Permit
The Overton Texas Police Department busted up an illegal lemonade stand operation recently.
The ‘lemonade stand’ was being operated by two underage juveniles – Zoey Green (age 7) and her alleged sister Andria Green (age 8) – pictured above. In addition to pitching sugary fruit drinks, it is reported they were attempting to pedal kettle corn to random passerby’s as well.
Overton Police Chief Clyde Carter was among the first law enforcement officers on the scene. Chief Carter informed the suspects they could not continue to operate their non-health department approved food and beverage scam.
He further enlightened the non-compliant suspects that they were required to pay the City of Overton $150 for a peddler’s permit. Additionally, the police chief put them on notice that they were in violation of local health codes due to their self-preparation of the kettle corn.
As you might imagine, liberal apologists for this illicit lemonade and popcorn ruse are up in arms all across East Texas. Assisted by legal advice from anonymous children’s entrepreneur groups in the area, the Green ‘sisters’ have chosen to invoke a common legal tactic to skirt this law: The Donation Loophole.
This little known, but legally effective (if not unethical) strategy allows these young shysters to re-open their operation and give the lemonade and kettle corn away for FREE while simultaneously asking for donations.
Apparently, as long as these juveniles “give away” their snacks and ask for donations, they are technically not breaking any laws. This nefarious activity has the side benefit of falling outside of the city peddling permits law and allowing operations beyond health department codes.
Hundreds of East Texans child product peddling advocates have pledged their support and plan to visit the this so called ‘donations only’ food and beverage operation on Saturday.
Their alleged mother – Sandi Green Evans – has reveled she too is in on the caper. Claiming that the donations collected by ‘her daughters’ on Saturday will be given to the Deana Rinehart and Felicia Roach Overton High School Sports Scholarship Fund.
Even nearby corporate interests have jumped into the fray under the notion of ‘bad publicity is better than no publicity: Zoey and Andria Green were given (free) water park tickets to both Six Flags and Splash Kingdom after this original story broke.
A news conference by the Texas State Attorney General’s Office concerning the matter is slated for later today.
Liberal leaning media outlets across the country are picking up this story and running with it in outlandish support of a child’s right to operate a lemonade stand without permits or health inspections – example: Yahoo! Parenting
Cullman Today fully supports law enforcement actions in this matter and have donated funds to the Chief Clyde Carter Juvenile Street Food and Beverage Shut Down Fund.
These sorts of young thugs need to be kept off the streets and their tainted ‘edible’ food products should be seized and destroyed on premises … immediately!
Editor’s Note: The above story is 100% true, however, our reporting is 100% satirical in nature.
With that said, law enforcement officers all over the United States are put in often challenging situations like this one. Police officer and sheriff’s deputies are required to ENFORCE existing statues. They do not write the laws.
As a result, law enforcement in this case is made out to be the bad guy. The only other choice would be ‘selective enforcement’ … which is not cool.
The real ‘bad guys’ are those in city/county government and health departments who threw together a completely reasonable boilerplate set of ordinances and laws without fully thinking through all the ramifications.
Don’t blame the cops, don’t blame society. Instead blame overworked lawmakers who can’t think of every contingency (even if that’s what they get paid to do).
BOTTOM LINE: Children’s lemonade stands should be EXEMPT from such laws … let kids be kids already.